Real Housewives of Beverly Hills

Sobriety: Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Recap

By  | 

This week on Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Kyle throws a party, Lisa has a party in her backyard, and Eden talks about sobriety.

NEW PARTY

Every year Maurice (Mauricio to his South American clients) and Kyle celebrate his birthday by asking their guests to dress as if they would be attending their own christening. Since this year The Agency had to sell a property large enough to accommodate a polygamous community they moved the festivities to the sale property’s backyard on a bluff in Malibu. As Kyle explained to her sweaty party planner in an oversized t-shirt, this year they would ask that guests wear Great Gatsby themed costumes so they could prolong their season-long braggadocio about their wealth. “The 20s were all about exposing your diamonds,” Kyle explained, “so I would have really enjoyed it.”

MY MEAT

Harry Hamlin was not only a stone cold fox, but a panther in the kitchen. Last year alone he competed in a neighborhood baking challenge crushing Cindy Crawford in the pie category. (His daughters weren’t that impressed since the runner-up has never eaten carbohydrates). He was overjoyed to help Lisa throw a barbecue offering to grill and cut up meat while the lady guests competed in the passive aggressive Olympics. “I don’t know how to cook, so I will leave it to my maids,” Lisa Rinna explained, “but I can offer everyone a bag of pills.” Eden brought them an empty bottle with the word LOVE painted across it. They thanked her and then regifted it to the maid for spending the afternoon rolling dough and cleaning up spilled mojitos.

SOBRIETY

Eden couldn’t help but overhear Eileen remark to Kyle how happy she was to have such a normal conversation with Kim. It had been an issue for Eden that Kim wouldn’t look into her eyes and showed no interest in participating in a never-ending public service announcement for addiction. “Maybe you should drop it,” said Dorit while pushing her hair extensions out of her face. After explaining that she felt as if Kim were abrasive to her upon their last meeting Erika wisely instructed Eden that it was best if she tempered her expectations. In other words, Kim will never be attending one of your pilates retreats or crystal conventions. Eden held Kyle in her arms longer than socially acceptable. Maybe if she talked about she enabled her sister 15 more times on camera she would have a breakthrough? Kyle was distracted by Lisa Rinna’s dog Lola taking a dump in the middle of the lawn.

Dorit apologized for having to leave early. She had to go to her son’s preschool open house. (Translation: she had to make her filler appointment). Lisa Rinna’s kids thanked Erika Jayne for being their spiritual advisor.

AUDITION

Erika, by the way, killed it during her Young and The Restless audition. “I haven’t acted since I was a kid,” explained Erika despite archival footage of her in a made for TV movie scene when she was seemingly 37 year old.

GATSBY

Later at the Great Gatsby party Kim attempted to walk down the property’s stairs sideways and in shoes she’d borrowed from her neighbor’s closet. She sat beside Kyle and allowed her to vent about the way Glen had arranged the DJ booth and how the moon wasn’t bright enough to light up the appetizer tables. Eden sauntered over in a dark wig and kneeled beside them. “Your relationship with your sister (she pointed to Kim) reminds me of the one I had with my sister who overdosed,” Eden said. Kyle searched for words to thank her. I am so glad you came to my Great Gatsby real estate presentation party (it was a tax write off), but can you talk about anything besides dependency on alcohol? She also wanted to make it clear that she was not an enabler. Had she not seen the limousine scene in the first season?

In the meantime Dorit’s husband PK told Lisa Rinna and Eileen they looked like muppets. Lisa Vanderpump made a surprise entrance and when told she looked regal explained to Erika that her crown was not for the taking. Erika was confused. “What crown? I don’t see one.” She found Eden sitting on a pool lounger and sat beside her blowing smoke in her face. “We got started off on the right foot, and I’m happy about that. But my other foot will kick you in the ass if you start messing with my friend Kyle.” She had practiced that one liner all afternoon.

Also in this episode: Dorit tried to work out with a trainer who may have appeared on Botched.

NEXT WEEK:

They go to Mexico.

Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, Recap, Sobriety

Join the newsletter

Subscribe to get our latest content by email.

Powered by ConvertKit

Kate is a humor writer covering pop culture including celebrity gossip analysis and show recaps, pregnancy, and parenting.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *