Real Housewives of OC Finale Wrap-Up

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God bless Bravo. I could not stop thinking all day about the Real Housewives of Orange County finale. Ill-fitted clothing, hair extensions, over accessorizing, fake tans, botox and face lifts, meaningless conversations, controlling husbands, mismanaging money, and impromptu prayer circles? Yes, please.

Why doesn’t anyone wear age appropriate clothing? Lynn’s daughter Alexa wears lady-of the-night attire. Why is a 15-year-old girl wearing Herve Leger? Vicki’s dress exposed her cleavage (front and back). Isn’t she 45 years old? Gretchen is 32 and wears dresses from Forever 21’s wedding collection. I think Slade borrowed his son’s prom tuxedo. Didn’t he forget the cane and top hat?

I already have issues with hair extensions. My irritation is amplified when a woman over the age of 40 has a head full. Tamra’s dead hair is too long and ratty. Why don’t her gay friends have an intervention?

They all need to go to rehab for spray tan addiction.

Someone needs to hit Lynne and Frank over the head with a frying pan. They keep getting evicted, but spend what is left on their credit cards on plastic surgery. Their daughter Raquel is without an education, a job, or any discernable skill set. How do they reward her? They get her a nose job. Thousands of dollars later she somehow ends up with the same exact nose. Well done. How could they not notice their daughters were completely wasted at the reunion party? Then again, they also hire a “Youthologist” to find out their own kids want to be disciplined. Jim’s offer to help Frank buy a house was priceless.

Why do bloated balloon head Alexis and her Ed Hardy wearing husband want to invite everyone to church with them? Did you know the preacher who came to breakfast at their house lives in Gainesville, Florida? He takes a private jet to Orange County on Sunday mornings so he can preach and then flies back the same day? Sounds like the money from the offertory goes towards jet fuel or his million dollar home.

Tamra has the courage to wear lingerie on national television, but can not tell her husband to stop blaming Vicki for their marriage problems? Their meltdown in the limousine, forced make-up in the hotel parking lot, passive aggressive snipes at the party, and Simon’s subsequent exit had all the makings of a Made for TV movie. Do you think Ryan threw a party once he heard they were finally getting divorced?

Where was Jo? Wouldn’t you have loved to see Jo and Gretchen have a dance off for Slade? 

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Comedian, Author, and Host of Reality Life with Kate Casey podcast.

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