Real Housewives of Orange County

Friendship: Real Housewives of OC Recap

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Season 12 Episode 10

This week on Real Housewives of Orange County Vicki pursued a new friendship with Tamra. Meghan was still reeling from drag bingo. Shannon and David had a discussion on a coach. Vicki threw herself a birthday party, and mysteriously Tamra’s former best friend showed up to reveal information about Eddie. 

LOST FRIENDSHIP

Meghan and Lydia walked four paces up a trail before they began rehashing the drag party of the night before. “I wasn’t uncomfortable because everyone was dressed like a man,” said Lydia, “it was because of the sexual innuendos.” She did not see a difference between Meghan texting Kelly with questions about an affair and having Kelly ask the same one in return. “But I was about to give birth to a baby!” screamed Meghan. But what if Kelly was about to give birth to a burrito or a turkey club? Would that have mattered? Point is, basically you got the same jab in return. Suddenly Meghan’s breasts began filling with milk. “Why am I here on a cliff trying to make you understand me when my baby is at home screaming for food?” “You should go,” said Lydia. Go now.

LOST LOVE

Shannon reached for David on the couch as their daughters completed her birthday cake. She reminded him that it had been six months since they held hands. “What have I done wrong?” she cried as a grip, three producers, two cameramen and the catering staff stood behind the camera. “Oh, sweetie,” said David, his teeth clenched and his eyes wide. “Are we having buttermilk marinated chicken again tonight?” he asked. “If so, I am going to need to run out so I can pick up something edible.” He took a long breath and starred out the floor length windows. “I just want you to be happy, and I know you are not,” he said with the tone of someone who had just been thrown through an electric fence. “It’s those allegations,” Shannon whispered. It was like Groundhog Day.

LOST APPETITE

For Eddie’s birthday Tamra arranged for a shuttle bus to take them to a restaurant known for serving food options on movie set props. “Look, it’s stale popcorn!” cried Meghan. “I’m eating this slab of beef,” said Shannon as a waiter served her meal on a metal chair. Lydia bailed because it was her son’s birthday. She did, however, attend Vicki’s self-thrown birthday party. This decision, of course, would haunt her later.  “I don’t understand English,” responded Peggy after Lydia confessed to the last minute change of plans, “but I know you messed up.”

LOST YEARS

On the occasion of the anniversary of her birth, Vicki threw a gala in her backyard, beside the grotto now corroded with asbestos. It was a joyous occasion with her relatives visiting from Chicago and the only Real Housewives willing to withstand Vicki’s insults, because it meant being on camera an extra fifteen minutes. “Let’s just go and try to get on screen,” Gretchen told Lizzie earlier that week. “Production says if we wear pageant dresses and you let your breasts drift out of your top we can close out the episode.”

Vicki, who had finally come around to the idea of Ryan, welcomed him into her spray-tanned arms. “We got you something,” Ryan told her as she held a box in her hands. They got her a gun. Moments later she walked downstairs onto her patio to a non-welcoming group of quasi-friends. “I am here,” she squealed with open arms. She looked less suited for a backyard party and more for a job turning letters on the set of Wheel of Fortune.

LOST INFORMATION

Towards the end of the party Kelly sat with Lizzie and Gretchen at a cocktail table. Slade had just left to fetch her floor length mink, a rental from a costume store. “It makes you look rich,” he told her that afternoon. “Bingo!” she yelled back. Kelly reminded Vicki that she and Lizzie had known each other for some time, probably days into her Bravo contract. “Remember at that gym in Aliso Viejo where we met up to jazzercise?” “Uh, yeah,” said Lizzie who focused her gaze on a second level bedroom light. “Remember when you told me that this guy said Eddie was gay,” she noted while pointing to a man with frosted tips standing beside the table.

“Years ago, back when I was still friends with Tamra, before she let me be her Matron of Honorable Achievement at her wedding, I saw Eddie kiss a man,” he explained. “Whaaaaaat?” said Gretchen. “Can you repeat that and look directly into the camera?” Vicki winked at them both and then looked at the cameraman and gave him a thumbs up.

Real Housewives of Orange County, Friendship, Tamra, Vicki, Eddie, Meghan

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