Real Estate Wars Recap: Teams
REAL ESTATE WARS
Real Estate Wars tells the story of two real estate teams vying for an imaginary trophy in achievement in MLS listing sales. The two teams are based in Orange County, California and led by two people who enjoy spray tanned skin and fancy shoes. John McMonigle was at one point the number one real estate agent in the country. He appeared in an episode of Oprah Winfrey about overpriced ocean homes and on Real Housewives of Orange County showing Heather Dubrow a plot of land. He lost it all when the market crashed, ultimately forcing him into bankruptcy. With the help of a team of young men with slim fitting pants and a woman with no interest in having children he hopes to recreate the McMonigle Team of yesteryear. The only thing standing in his way is the Relegance Group, a quintet of super aggressive real estate agents including Jojo Romeo, surprisingly not the lead singer of a Bananarama cover band, but an estranged employee of John McMonigle. With her team she hopes to destroy McMonigle’s hope for worldwide real estate sales domination.
McMonigle Group: John, Hunter, Drew, Leo, and Hoda.
Relegance Group: Jojo, Spyro, Kylie, Eliisa, and Kacey.
MOST NOTABLE MOMENTS FROM EPISODE 1
- John McMonigle might a robot. He is frozen in time. He looks alarmingly like William McNamara, star of Stealing Home.
- I can’t understand anything Spyro says. At one time he was an aerobics instructor and model.
- JoJo has many children with different husbands. She loves yoga and loathes John.
- Real estate agents like to pre-game before a big sale by throwing a house party with copious amounts of alcohol for brokers.
- Most real estate agents hate each other, but pretend to like one another so they can make a sale.
- The best way to sell a crappy house is to focus on the positives. Examples: “It’s not a money pit, it’s the next chapter in your life. It’s not a shit box; it’s cozy and charming. It’s got beautiful lighting, and not this should be torn down because it’s unlivable.”
- Kylie used to be a fitness model. She was runner up in the McMonigle internship competition early in her career. Her husband makes delicious pancakes.
- A developer named Micheal made both teams vie for his attention in the foyer of a home no one wanted to buy.
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