Show Recaps

Nikolai: 14 Observations From Vanderpump Rules Reunion Part Two

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WHAT I LEARNED FROM THE VANDERPUMP RULES REUNION: PART TWO

Lala addressed rumors she is dating a married man, Stassi’s brother Nikolai offered life advice to adults, Scheana confronted Katie about her drinking, and Ariana reiterated she loathes Stassi.

THANKS, NIKOLAI

  1. Jax and DJ James Kennedy are like twins born in separate uteruses a decade apart.
  2. Should anyone crash Andy Cohen’s birthday party in June they will enjoy the sound of James pressing play on his iPod behind a desk while wearing enormous headphones.
  3. Scheana has a very specific diet free of sugar, gluten, wine, and basically carbohydrates. The others do not support her diet, which is why Scheana is typically miserable on all cast related trips.
  4. Kristen thought a clambake meant getting stoned in a Pontiac alongside a freeway, and not baking clams at a party in the Hamptons.
  5. Brittany was happy to take a used water bottle shower on their trip to a Nascar race because she is a proud redneck.
  6. Lala handles anxiety attacks by relaxing by a pool, getting massages, and eating appetizer plates at a resort in Beverly Hills.
  7. Lala may or may not be dating a married man, a fact she didn’t care to discuss despite signing up to be on a reality TV show. She also paid for her Range Rover, sometimes driven by strange men, with the money she made from modeling in teen catalogs.
  8. Lala makes friends sign non-disclosure agreements in the event they intend to film her smoking without clothes in a motel bathtub. As an aside, Brittany had no idea what an NDA or an MBA means.
  9. Stasis’s 12-year-old brother Nikolai is now a paid consultant for Bravo. He reviews all programming in addition to old episodes of Sex in The City despite the fact he is in the 6th grade.
  10. Lisa Vanderpump hopes Lala will return to the show because she has always seen another side of Lala, which is the side that makes for good television.
  11. Scheana is still unhappy she spent several hundred dollars on Katie’s wedding.
  12. Schwartz has yet to spend quality time with the blow up doll Lisa purchased Katie as a bridal shower gift.
  13. Scheana confronted Katie about her drinking problem while her ex-husband whom she claimed had recovered from his own addiction issues waited in the wings.
  14. Ariana will always hate Stassi.

NEXT WEEK:

More skating costumes.

Vanderpump Rules, Nikolai, Reunion, Part Two

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Comedian, Author, and Host of Reality Life with Kate Casey podcast.

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