My Review of Oprah Favorite Things
Every year Oprah releases her annual list of her favorite things in time for the holiday season. This year’s list, compiled in O, The Oprah Magazine, includes no less than 104 items, which is astonishing if you consider how hard it is for you to shop for three relatives two days before Christmas. How can you come up with 104 items you believe no other human should choose to live without?
OPRAH FAVORITE THINGS
My list would include thoughtful items including an Amazon subscription to watch every episode of Real Housewives of New York, a month supply of cabernet, and some sort of roaming vacuum.
Here are my favorite items from this year’s Oprah’s Favorite Things list.
1. FOOT TREATMENT SET
You want a slice of heaven? Shove soaking salts and lotion into a pair of socks and let the dream begin. Your feet deserve a moisture prison, so give it to them.
2. LEATHER WEDGE SNEAKERS
Why not? I love to look like an extra in 1984’s Breakin’ 2: Electric Boogaloo. Because it is comfortable to complete a cardio workout in shoes that look and feel like boxing gloves.
3. COLORING BOOKS
Escape from your kids by pretending you are a kid with markers and hallucinogenic pictures.
4. “CHEESE” CAKE
Maybe you like cheese? I happen to think it is vile and the thought of chewing on a wedge of Humboldt fog makes me dry heave. If you know someone who has zero concerns about digestive issues or mucus forming foods this might be your jam. Throw in a couple succulents on top of your dairy wheel and you’ve got a garden party.
5. SECURITY HOME DEVICE
Let’s be honest, you don’t trust your friends, and I don’t trust mine either. You can no longer pretend the tequila got up and walked away itself with this at home surveillance system. Watch questionable behavior by your kids, babysitter, or your in-laws with a live HD video feed via an app on your phone.
6. POINSETTIA CAKE
Devour a chocolate cake with vanilla mousse, which also happens to look like a plastic plant usually located by the firewood at your local grocery store. You could easily make this cake at your house and then cover it with leaves from your own yard, but this gem costs as much as theater tickets and the decoration could be used to accessorize a re-gift.