Kate's Life

This Explains My Aversion To Direct Selling Home Parties

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I have an aversion to home selling parties. While I appreciate someone’s friendship and know they have access to tremendous body oils, charm bracelets, Tupperware, and kitchen utensils my discomfort is based on three specific life experiences.

#1. My senior year of college I drove home to Philadelphia under the guise my family would be celebrating my birthday. There was no cake. You know what was there? My mom’s estranged cousin Amy who was a regional director for Partylite candles, a direct seller of premium candles and high-quality home fragrances, including oils, room sprays and melts. I drove two and a half hours north to celebrate the anniversary of my birth but instead had to sit through an hour-long sconce presentation in the living room.  
Result: I bought a candle and we never heard from cousin Amy ever again.
 #2. I made the mistake of signing up for one of those 3-day charity walks for breast cancer. You have to walk 26 miles a day, sleep in a tent in the rain, and get your loved ones to sponsor you for almost $2,000. I hate asking people for money. It’s the reason I could never work in campaign finance or move up the ranks in the Girl Scouts. I raised $400. You know who had to pony up the rest of the cash? I did. I paid $1,400 to walk from Baltimore, Maryland to Washington DC. 
Result: I lost a toenail and my dignity.
#3. My friend Megan invited me to a “fun girls party” in Los Angeles. She neglected to tell me it was a sex toy party. Do I regret that I ended up sitting next to a colleague’s girlfriend? Of course I did because now every time I see him I can’t help but wonder if he was satisfied with the plug she bought him. 
Result: I think it is better if I don’t know what everyone is buying.

I don’t want to worry that purchasing a product means I am unknowingly supporting a pyramid scheme that at some point might be investigated by the United States Securities and Exchange Commission. I don’t want to be angry that I just got swindled into buying a $500 set of plastic containers. I want to come to your house, enjoy a glass of iced tea and not feel pressured to buy lavender oil because it’s supposed to calm me down if I rub it all over my feet.

It’s too much pressure.

Direct Selling Home Parties

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mm

Comedian, Author, and Host of Reality Life with Kate Casey podcast.

0 Comments

  1. Amanda

    October 8, 2014 at 9:07 pm

    My hubby calls them F%@& your Friends parties. He’s right. But sadly I’m a sucker for CAbi and Stella.

  2. Katy

    October 9, 2014 at 1:36 pm

    Could not agree more! I feel the same way about my kid’s school sending home a “fund raising” package in which they expect my 7 year old to go door to door soliciting our neighbors. Am I alone in finding this unacceptable and ridiculous? I’d rather send a donation to my son’s overpriced private school then force my child to do something I never would. I think the worst part is that they make it a contest or have a pizza party for the kids that extort the most money from their relatives.

    • mm

      Kate

      October 9, 2014 at 7:33 pm

      So gross. I refuse to do it.

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