Uncategorized Posts
Carrie Underwood is a Better Wife Than Me
Dear Kate, You need to get your act together. Have you seen this week’s issue of People Magazine? There is a country music star on the cover chatting about her sweet and sexy marriage and the importance of being a hot wife. Might want to run some interference at the mailbox. Don’t let your husband make any trips to the grocery. For the love of God, don’t let him stop … Continue reading
Gwyneth Paltrow is Becoming a Real Housewife
I am starting to think Gwyneth Paltrow is starting to turn into one of the Real Housewives. If you’ve ever watched an episode of the series you will note they are always shilling something. Once they land a spot on the show they are suddenly selling everything from wine to bags to workout videos. Because it makes sense that someone who was just a lady living in some random city … Continue reading
Ryan Cabrera Tattooed Ryan Gosling’s Face on His Leg
“Me and my buddy we go in [the tattoo parlor] and he chooses one thing off the wall for me, then I choose one thing for him,” Cabrera explained. “You can’t see it until after it’s done and then we unveil them at the same time. The only rules are that it can’t be religious and it can’t offend anybody.” Ryan Cabrera – One-hit musician and former boyfriend of Ashlee … Continue reading
Real Housewives of Orange County Premiere Recap
Vicki has been busy with Project Overhaul. “Whether it’s my body or my home, I recognized I needed to re-caulk my life”. She had grown tired of hearing she looked like a pig, so she got Jim Bellino on the horn and asked him what model chin he bought at the face factory. Plus Brianna is having a baby and she wanted to clean out the laundry room to make … Continue reading
Can We Discuss Theme Weddings?
The New York Post reported this past weekend Facebook co-founder and billionaire Sean Parker would marry his fiancée, Alexandra Lenas, in June during a medieval-themed costume party. “There will be some kind of medieval theme, and guests will each get their own costumier. It’s not yet fully decided what the costumes will be like, the theme is supposed to fit in with the environment and the natural beauty of the … Continue reading
I Think I Have Failed Easter
C and E Urban Dictionary: People who only show up at church on Christmas and Easter, the only two times a year where church attendance seems ‘mandatory’. Use: Better set up more chairs in the sanctuary so all the C and E folks have a place to sit. I am not even part of this tribe anymore. It’s Easter Sunday and I have yet to leave my house. I had … Continue reading
Me vs. Pippa Middleton: Lifestyle Expert Extraordinaire
Pippa Middleton’s got to make a living too. So I guess now she’s now a lifestyle expert. Sure, her family owns a party supplies company. It’s pretty much the only place any of the Middleton kids have ever worked. Some kids work for their family’s water bottle or air conditioning supply company. The Middletons sell cake toppers. But just because your mom sells paper plates doesn’t mean you can make … Continue reading
You Want to Date Rob Kardashian?
My Young Friends, Think of me as an older sister. A fun yet ball busting older lady who wants the best for you. You deserve to find someone who is special, someone who will treat you well. There are plenty of dating sites these days. Your friends probably know a single guy or two. So can we just take Rob Kardashian out of contention? I’ve seen a lot, my friends. … Continue reading
The Case for Maternity Clothes
There comes a time in every woman’s pregnancy where you have to face the fact that your jeans are just not going to button. It’s what I would call a release the seams moment. You see growing a human being in your lady sac requires additional cabin space. That uterus of yours needs to stretch. Then throw in bowel distention (the result of constipation and gas), enlarged milk jugs, and … Continue reading
Real Housewives of Beverly Hills Finale Recap
Brandi and Yolanda needed to walk away to collect themselves. Faye’s suggestion that Brandi was responsible for the demise of Paul and Adrienne’s marriage was laughable for a few reasons: 1. The couple has clearly despised each other for years 2. It was still debatable whether Adrienne was really a man or a woman and 3. They had little in common outside of an appreciation for plastic surgery. But Faye … Continue reading