Show Recaps

The Bachelor Recap: Goodbye Annaliese

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This week on The Bachelor eight women were selected for a wrestling-themed date, a one-on-one date in Napa goes south, and Annaliese got rejected. 

GOODBYE ANNALIESE

HATRED

  1. Bibiana and Krystal hate each other, but sit next to one another in every scene.

WRESTLING

  1. Two retired female wrestlers explained the mechanics involved in throwing one’s body via forward roll across a ring in attempt to scare the shit of a component. Bibiana and Tia proved to be weak wailing behind the ropes because they were unable to stand up to the retirees. Arie wore a Zorro mask, and his lady contestants wore Halloween costumes. The audience gasped as two lady contestants made overly sexual gestures toward one another. Tia came full circle by prancing around the ring in a sheep costume and leading her partner Bibiana to an emotional victory.
  2. Bibiana spent her last meeting with Arie complaining about Krystal, a woman with the voice of a fan. “I think Arie and I have the strongest relationship so far,” said Krystal as the lower part of her hair was slowly dying. Tia thanked Arie for being supportive though the entire time he spoke she thought about the boyfriend she forgot to dump back home. She hoped he didn’t watch this episode, because her tongue was down someone else’s throat. Bekah the nanny talked about her last serious relationship, which was presumably in the 8th grade. She received a red rose to the astonishment of Krystal who had convinced herself she was two tablescapes away from a wedding reception at a racetrack.

WINE TASTING

  1. Arie took one of the women named Lauren to Napa to go wine tasting. “I could see myself living here one day,” he said. It was unclear whether there was room for him at one of the local real estate offices. He noted how much he enjoyed going to bed early, wearing cardigans, and playing bridge with his friends at the retirement home. Lauren admitted to producers she was nervous. She sabotaged their date by talking in circles about her mom’s eye problems and how much she enjoyed music. Arie held the rose in his hands and then placed it back on the table. “Yep, it’s not going to work for us,” he told her. She left in a limo. The other lady contestants wept as her suitcase was removed. Krystal, because she is crazy, smiled and then explained to the others the importance of being vulnerable. Caroline openly wished Krystal fell in a hole.

ANNALIESE

  1. The second group date involved preparing for a make believe dog show. Annaliese, the same woman who has dealt with lifelong issues stemming from a bumper car incident spoke openly about her fear of dogs. (Producers reenacted a scene involving a young Annaliese and a dog named Sunshine to highlight the matter). While Fred Willard commentated the lady contestants tried desperately to convince dogs to jump through hoops while toddlers screamed in terror.
  2. Later, during the cocktail party portion, Chelsea noted that although she had left her daughter behind she kept reminding herself being on The Bachelor was for a greater mission. Annaliese fumbled in her quiet moment alone with Arie. In fact she had not even made it to the hallway before he was swallowing someone else’s face. While Becca was confident in their relationship, he gave the rose to Chelsea.
  3. Bibiana set up a planetarium themed date, but Arie asked her to circle back to him later after he’d made out with at least six other people.
  4. Arie asked the youngest lady contestant if she were ready for marriage. She assured him that she was, but also that she didn’t necessarily need him. It surprised Arie how much that answer turned him on. Tia made him swill a mason jar filled with moonshine. Annaliese admitted to Arie that she was perplexed why he had not kissed her yet. “I just don’t think we are there yet,” he said despite basically dry humping several other women within the first twenty minutes of the first night. He kicked her off the show before the rose ceremony even began.
  5. There may be something wrong with Jenna.
  6. Arie handed roses to Caroline, Kendall, Ashley, Lauren, Brittany, Becca, Seine, Krystal, Tia, Maquel, Jenna, Jacqueline, and Marikh. Bibiana was sent home.

NEXT WEEK: Bekah reveals her true age.

The Bachelor, Recap, Annaliese

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