20 Reasons You Are a Great Mother on Mother’s Day
It’s Mother’s Day again, which means your husband and kids will wait until the last minute to buy you a card from the 7-Eleven. Has anyone remembered you are raising children and deserve some recognition?
This is a tribute to you.
20 REASONS YOU ARE A GREAT MOTHER
- Thank you for growing that baby inside your lady cavity for nearly ten months. That year could have been spent enjoying delicious vodka tonics, pinot grigio, or margaritas, but you made your health and that of your fetus a priority.
- While everyone held your baby and marveled at their beauty you wore a frozen diaper in your mesh underwear, sat on a donut pillow, and wondered if you would ever be able to wear normal pants again.
- Thanks to you for those months you spent tortured by suction apparatus with mangled nipples because you hoped it would give your baby a higher IQ.
- You could have woken up early to take a shower, straighten your hair, put on a nice outfit, and apply makeup, but you didn’t because if someone in the family has to look homeless it shouldn’t be the kids.
- Thank you for all the times you could have spent the weekend with your friends from college or at a spa, but going to a swim meet or subjecting yourself to a dance recital was more important.
- For figuring out how to get to work and keep your clients happy on top of getting the sisters from Frozen or a Ninja Turtle to perform at your kid’s birthday party.
- For all those times you sat through an animated movie when you would have been much happier bingeing an entire season of Vanderpump Rules.
- A million thanks for allowing your one vacation this year to be spent at a Disney themed resort.
- Thank you for spending more time considering where to enroll your kids for elementary school than you spent looking at colleges.
- For spending money that could have gone towards restoring your beauty on swim and skateboard lessons, summer camp, and school tuition.
- For spending countless hours explaining simple math problems only to have your child forget everything they learned five minutes before the test.
- All of the times you forfeited a restless night of sleep because you wanted to make sure your child threw up in a toilet bowl and not all over the expensive carpet.
- For the hours you spent on Pinterest researching unicorn and Star Wars themed party favors and decorations when a bunch of 6 year olds only want to eat pizza and destroy your house.
- Thank you for still allowing your child to attend Girl Scout Camp even though you have watched too many Lifetime movies about kidnappings.
- A round of applause for all the times you slipped on urine in the bathroom, dealt with a headful of lice, and drove in a small car that smelled like rotten eggs.
- For maintaining your composure when another parent bragged about their child’s reading level, athletic ability, or desire to start a global charity even though they are only 4.
- Thank you for agreeing to get a dog even though they promised they would pick up the feces.
- No one helps you remove the backpacks, grocery bags, or sports equipment from your car.
- You would love to drive a sports car, but you drive a minivan covered in dents.
- You had to explain why your child can not have a sleepover with people you barely know 76 times last week.
Happy Mother’s Day.
I salute you, sister friends.
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