12 Things You Can Learn From Watching Ladies of London
These are the most important things I learned from last night’s episode of Ladies of London.
- Caroline Fleming is an important person in London society because some of her relatives lived in castles. Because of this she can wear ball gowns to dinner. One is supposed to look over the fact that she hums like a person suffering with a mental disorder or that she has a demonic laugh because she has a fancy last name and was once a model.
- Although she paints herself as a Martha Stewart of sorts because she purees mango for her dogs she serves her guests hot Cheetos appetizers and Scandinavian roast duck that must be devoured in a bowl or gnawed off the bone.
- Caroline Fleming of Denmark requires her guests to arrive on time, wear red, and fill up on champagne because though she has access to money she refuses to hire someone to help her prepare meals because she has control issues.
- She also kicks people out of her house mid-dinner because she’s got 3 kids sleeping upstairs and needs enough time to clean up the goose bones.
- Caroline Stanbury awakens at 9:30 in the morning, has someone bring her a latte, and later on in the evening that same person removes her clothes for her.
- Things aren’t going so well at the sweatshop that Caroline calls the gifting spot where people in Europe can buy fancy overpriced candles and tote bags. Pauline, a library assistant and gift wrapper, sleeps underneath her desk and Caroline’s assistant cries in the bathroom when no one is looking.
- Julie married a Brit, is considered a legit Lady, and her husband could be king if 320 other people in line for the throne suddenly disappeared but since she’s from Sugar Grove, Illinois she has to rely on Annabelle to lend her prom gowns.
- Annabelle is still a pillar in the London fashion world because of her long legs, blunt bangs, and ability to give a good photo.
- Juliet and Marissa’s friendship has been heading south for the last year. Juliet not showing up for her Thanksgiving themed birthday party and Marissa not understanding that a proper American turkey dinner should be prepared in the comfort of a British person’s gourmet kitchen really put the kibosh on a possible repair.
- Marissa continued her yearly tradition of Christmas carol enjoyment but refused to invite Juliet and her husband and kids. Luke, Caroline Stanbury’s unmarried and childless makeup artists did score an invite as did Caroline’s sister-in-law Sophie who Bravo is trying to make happen this season.
- Annabelle explained that Marissa’s thirst for aristocratic connection comes from a place of deep upper middle class hunger. She can throw as many dinner parties as she wants and throw on darling to every greeting and make sure her kids have accents, but she will never be fully accepted as one of them.
- If it were not for her husband Gregor’s advice Juliet would be sitting in a bottomless puddle of tears and black eyeliner.
Next week: Juliet and Caroline of Denmark challenge each other to a yoga head spin challenge.
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